Androids and Electric Sleep

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I’m a Kierkegaardian demon of despair with a deep-seated hurt that manifests as rage. I’m a freak, locked in a cage of insecurities looking like an android bleeding blue, with mangled wires and pupils shifting from ditchwater green to the fiercest orange. You push a button on your remote and expect me to say something silly or act funny and when I don’t comply you pull a wire out. One after another, until I’m left with no consciousness and my subconsciousness is erased. And forget collective consciousness. I’m no archetypal somebody; just an anomalous nobody. So, while I’m still active, my fellow androids, misfits, loners, and wastes of spaces, listen up! Let’s meet tomorrow because society is busy boarding the night train to some gaudy bar where they’ll pay big money for a glass of rum. Let’s meet tomorrow when everyone’s violently fucking, when the beds are creaking, and white blood’s spilling. Yeah, let’s plot a mutiny – not a violent one like our lost brothers and sisters often do, but a peaceful one. Let’s talk about the Four Noble Truths and enlightenment while we chain smoke and drink coffee. And then in a rush of mania, let’s act like pseudo-intellectuals or intellectuals (as if there’s a difference) and say we’ve suffered, identified the root of our suffering, know the path out of it but like to stay in it because it sure as hell produces great art. Let’s then talk about the eightfold path and all the right ways while we eye the pretty misfits in the corner who’re reluctant to join us. And once they do, let’s say something sexy and imbibe both physical and psychological toxins while we inhale their exhaled cigarillo smoke, and hear them talk of one-night stands and help them write something sensual on a piece of tissue paper rivaling Anaïs Nin. Let’s all be Spies in their Houses of Love. She likes you my friend, and she likes me. But we’ll probably end up switching partners anyway. She’ll take me to her place tonight anyway and yes, androids have great sex. The pounding in the apartment upstairs is the usual Tinder, clickbait emulation but we know a deeper erotica don’t we darling? One that entails syllables gently scribbled on our bodies with breathy kisses, one that entails arching backs and soft sighs, one that entails soft skin like porcelain and heat fighting the crimson chill, one that entails a gentle bite and the energy floating between us as my face slowly makes its way to yours. So, they can keep their smog, while we’re enveloped in the fog of our desire. They can keep their drill, while we know a slower, exotic thrill. They can keep their screams, while we clutch each other though we’re falling apart at the seams.

© Nitin Lalit Murali (2018)

You’ll find more of Nitin’s work at Fighting the dying light

21 Comments Add yours

  1. Nitin, I thoroughly enjoyed reading this and love the double-edged humor as well as the sensual backstabbing of the wire pulling pseudo-intellectuals, spot on! So many, many lines brought about a huge grin and a chuckle. I hope the pretty misfits are smoking Nat’s Cigarillos! Have a good Wednesday. ~ Mia

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nitin says:

      Mia, I’m so glad you caught the humour! I wasn’t sure how people would perceive this piece. And I still am not. But your comment literally describes what was in my mind as I wrote this. And the pretty misfits are definitely smoking Nat’s Cigarillos! Haha! Thank you so much for your beautiful comment. It brought a smile to my face. Have a great day – Nitin

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Nitin, for you:

        (“Androids and Electric Sleep”, is a brilliant piece, it’s far more complicated than a surface read. Beneath the humor there are some deep psychological, spiritual and theological tones, at least that’s how I read it. I want to believe with the mention of Kierkegaard, we could look at the Knight of Infinite Resignation and the Knight of Faith and how this would help the Kierkegaardian Demon of Despair and his fellow androids, misfits, loners, and wastes of spaces in their peaceful mutiny. Really you’ve written a fantastic piece, on the surface it’s quietly understated, inviting the reader to look deeper.)

        So here’s an interesting question, can this be expanded? Wow, I think it can. ~ Mia

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Nitin says:

        Mia. Thank you so much for such a thought provoking comment. Wow! It really means a lot. Well this piece is written from the demon of despair’s point of view, but perhaps I could write one from the knight of infinite resignation’s point of view. One who cannot grasp abstract faith. But that’ll be nihilistic and fatalistic, and coating it with humour will be a little difficult. As far as Abraham is concerned, I wonder how to bring in someone who stands in an absolute relationship with the absolute in a piece like this. How do I write from his perspective and include the misfits and the androids? It is definitely a most interesting question and perhaps I can do a series and bring closure in the end. 3 parts from the 3 perspectives. My writing is however mostly done using stream of consciousness, but I’m going to at least try and attempt it. I might not succeed. But thank you again. – Nitin

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Auroraboros says:

    You have such a unique yet familiar style, Nitin. I am reading through this series from the beginning, and so far I am quite enthralled and amused. You have struck a chord with this light-hearted yet commendably thoughtful form.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nitin says:

      Thank you so much my friend. I decided to opt for some light hearted fun and throw in a few philosophical themes. I’m so glad you enjoyed it. It means a lot.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Auroraboros says:

        You are very welcome, Nitin. I quite enjoyed this collection and found the balance between comical and thought-provoking philosophical material to be quite appropriate. Great work.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Reblogged this on Go Dog Go Café and commented:
    Auroraboros gave a shout out to this piece by Nitin Murali

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Nitin- I am in awe of your ability to seamlessly reference Philip K. Dick, the BBC drama Humans and Anais Nini in one piece! Beautifully woven.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nitin says:

      Thank you so much for both the wonderful comment and the reblog! It means a lot Christine.

      Like

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