Welcome to the Optimism on Steroids contest. Please write a gooey, saccharine, cringy inspirational paragraph (that will make Hallmark cards sound like poetry) on your blog or in the comments section. Address it to Gilbert who is our depressed Literati Mafia Mascot. Feel free to make sure it’s full of fluff. Add your sugary metaphors, your awful puns and shallow humour to make sure Gilbert feels more miserable. Remember the point is being bad at being good. Be one of those ‘friends’ who prattles on about believing in yourself and taking a leap of faith or whatever. We will announce the winner soon.