out of my head

i’m so sick of me i’m so tired of always being in my head i want out not to be someone else just not to be me for a little while or ever… but i’m so rooted rooted in who i am celebrating my shortcomings & downfalls crawling about the labyrinths of my mind cackling…

unraveling me

i need this day to blow itself away as sad sings in my heart & i wonder where does the wonder the wonder i spill from me for the world to see where does the wonder go? is it looked after? cared for… nurtured? these parts of me i share does someone love them? as…

he is the drink

he is the drink that i shouldn’t take the fall from grace the downward spiral to hopelessness & a crippling lack of faith he is the drink i shouldn’t take the step towards no control my soul crumpled on the floor forgotten panties stained & unwanted he is the drink to which i should shout…

my guardian dear

i felt myself replacing trading one obsession for another looking for a new lead in the stories to tell myself at night to keep me from studying eternity & collapsing into my own anxiety stories to help me not be consumed by my own lonely heart and hollow soul i tell myself stories about someone…

ragdoll

so much of my life spent punishing myself by choosing & letting myself be chosen by the wrong people people who will hurt & belittle cut me down make me feel like i think i deserve to feel… the rest of my life spent recovering finding myself healing looking for connection fearing connection both seeking…

frankenstein’s monster

franken baby monster me abandoned by my creator ridiculed…abused… i thought my soul was calloused over that she could do no more to hurt me i guess a mother’s love or lack thereof is something you never grow too old to find injury in.   © quixotic mama 2018 find more of my art &…

worst

you can’t hurt me i will hurt myself first i will hurt myself worst you can’t degrade me i will push myself into the mud i will mock myself i will revel in my own pain you can’t destroy me that is what i do best.   © quixotic mama 2018 find more of my…