this hole in me

part of me is missing maybe you know where it is? every morning i wake up knowing it’s another day feeling lost that it is another day another day another night i go to bed knowing that my morning my next day will bring more of the same & i want to scream sometimes i…

Pathetic

Pathetically I masquerade as a happy woman Smiling, listening, responding. Just as pathetically I wait day after day for you For a word, perhaps three a sign, a show, a glimmer of hope. Realistically I appear to be a woman unconcerned Cold, unfeeling, aloof. Just as realistically I listen night after night to you Fighting…

Waiting

It’s only been a week and god how I miss him I miss his texts I miss his smile I miss what he does to my body How he could read me so easily How he slipped in between the cracks and the chinks of my armor How he read my mind and wrapped me…

A Little Different

Why do I want him so much? It almost doesn’t seem fair. Nor healthy. Nor normal. I imagine that other people go through their day-to-day buying groceries, walking the dog, painting pictures, texting their mom, watching Netflix, driving up the coast, checking the speedometer when they pass a cop, eating breakfast, reading the paper, mowing…

Just Dreams

Woke up rather lonely Roll over Sigh Cold sheets over there Pull the blankets tighter about my hips Wishing, longing for his arms His breath on my shoulder “….morning..” A kiss Sliding my body closer still to his own Resting Knowing I’m his and he’s mine And we’ve got Thousands more mornings Just like this…

Bar Fly

Tonight she easily found a seat at the nearly deserted bar of the pub near her home. She sat alone listening to a background murmur of conversation from the tube and a game of darts in the corner but a few minutes alone before the bartender slid her drink over. Swiveling in her seat, two…

déjà vu

Today I feel naked and vulnerable and more than ever I wish I had his arms to lie in. I need him to carry me and speak sense into me and tell me I can be exposed before him. Everything feels like I’m on repeat. I’m sure I’ve done this before. Felt this pit in…